Time

I found this file dated November 2015 stashed in a flash drive. I think this was supposed to be my first blog entry but scrapped it. I don’t really remember the reason why but knowing me, it might be because it was too.. I don’t know,  personal? Anyway, posting it now! 🙂

I recently posted a tweet saying I was going to work out after seeing photos from the Victoria Secret Fashion Show because you know, VS Angels. My friend responded telling me she wished she could buy more time since she was so busy with work and her business. I read her tweet while I was stuck in traffic (as always) on my way to work, and it got me thinking. Isn’t it ironic that time has been said to never end, yet time is always what we always say we need more of?

When I was a kid, I had a collection of Barbie dolls. I lived my imaginary adult life through my dolls. She would be strutting down the runway (Yes, I once dreamed of being a fashion model) with her long legs and narrow waist. I couldn’t wait to grow up and do the same.

When I was in college, I began feeling like somehow time was going by fast. I had so much to do with so little time. Sophomore year gave me six days of classes. I was suffering by then I called my mom and just broke down. I wanted college to be over soon because I didn’t want the work anymore. Of course, college was still fun but I (or maybe all of us) wanted it to be over. I wanted my freedom; I wanted my own money; I wanted my new life.

When I started working, time went by faster. I also began to notice something. Everybody was in a rush. Everybody wanted to be first. Projects needed to be delivered the shortest time possible because this might mean repeat business or opportunities for more business. The less time you take in completing one task, the more tasks you can complete in a period of time. On the other hand, looking at the roads here in Metro Manila, you will notice how utterly selfish drivers can be. From counter-flowing to blocking intersections, drivers have a way of ruining your day just so they can go first. Somehow time and ultimately, going first became the priority.

The belief that doing more with little time has taken over our way of life. Most of the people I know don’t have time to eat breakfast before going to work for fear of being late. We sacrifice a thing or two in the morning just to make it in time for work. We are always in a hurry, hopping from one thing to the next. This is why we don’t have enough time. We don’t know how to stop anymore. We get antsy if we’re not doing anything and yet, on days when we have to do a lot of things, that’s when we just want to lie down and not move.

What I want to say is, we do have enough time but we don’t have it now. We want everything now because we’ve been told to do everything now.

Now that I am adult working in this fast-paced city, I want to go back to being that messy kid just wishing to grow up. I want to go back to that life that did not need to be lived quickly (and full of projects) in order to feel accomplished; to that life when eating a bar of Hershey’s chocolate was the heaven I only needed. Since I can’t possibly do that, this is where this (whatever this is) comes in. This is my nth attempt at writing to let ideas just flow. I wouldn’t want to call it a blog as this pressures me into writing for the blog’s sake. I’m just going to take this one rambling at a time and see where it goes. Let’s just say this is me on a chocolate-high.

 

 

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